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ChefBrianKnows
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Name: Chef
Gender: Male


Interests: Denture Koalas, House made of pancakes with a garage made of the souls of little children.
Expertise: Newborn hubcaps


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AIM: SheriffCrawfish


Member Since: 1/24/2006

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Sunday, April 16, 2006

Chef Brian Says

Dear Chef Brian,
Why do girls have boobs?
Sincerely,
Several Slightly Disturbed People

CB - Well kids, it's simple as a tuna wrench.  Girls make monkey pies with their heads to please the mighty pineapple gods of Kenya.  If granted, they enforce a powerful black olive to reign supreme on all who oppose the laws of a thumbtack.  Those that survive get chicken winged plumes, or boobs.  Good pie indeed.


Monday, February 06, 2006

Chef Brian Says

Dear Chef Brian,
Will there ever be a grand war between ninjas and pirates?
Sincerely,
Tommy from Iowa

Tommy, ninjas and pirates are funny potatoes.  If they were ever to meet, there would be a massive grater and a sponge between all that is gooey.  Should this happen, I recommend you stir vigorously until the eggplant melts onto your shoe.  Then fill your house with cake.  You'll never be delicious again!


Sunday, January 29, 2006

Chef Brian Says

Dear Chef Brian,
Why is there a hole in the ozone layer?
Sincerely,
Jimmy from Maryland

Well Jimmy, cheese fries make naughty crackers.  When this happens, you must watch the infinate sea of oysters overcome the sheer power of an incredible ocelot.  The otters have chosen to be the protectors so may napalm explode in your sock.

Forks.


Tuesday, January 24, 2006